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.​.​.​Again

by The Ellie Badge

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1.
Spit me straight out of the water I am born on the sand This is life, this is forever It's the cycle again One day I'll learn to love And it'll all fall apart And then I'll learn to live with loneliness And holes in my heart It is cold cause it is Winter But when Spring comes around It will melt all this unhappiness Like snow on the ground You know nothing lasts forever But we're given the chance To try and make the best of this As long as we can Yeah you know that We all are born on an Island
2.
Blood 03:29
Spring is just an acronym for something I can't comprehend Where everything is cyclical and we all come back again And I know that I've been everything from skin and bones to gasoline But nothing ever mattered like this did For once I feel like there's a purpose Beneath this pop-punk-hipster surface I really hope that I'm not wrong... Cause I've been way away too long I've been out here on my own And I've got blood all through my engine But my engine doesn't run I've been way away too long So let's talk about the situation born of blood in celebration Of a a feeling I just can't describe... I'm back and God it feels so good to feel the sun on these old wounds So I'll wear them on my wrists where I can't hide Cause I've taken all the things I've seen From all these teen pop magazines I've chewed them up and spit them into song... Cause I've been way away too long I've been out here on my own And I've got blood all through my engine But my engine doesn't run I've been way away too long
3.
Bones 03:49
I remember every evening that you took them away from me I realized you weren't worth it... You give no guarantees And even though my world is so fucked up; my life is crumbling I will not take you back cause you don't have the comfort that I need but everything I said, it stays on repeat at night. It rambles through my head But what I said was true, Especially the part about how much I needed you... And all I needed was someone to tell me so. Now every day without means the more I feel alive And every day I wonder why I used to let you take up all my time And maybe, Oh just maybe I will see you when I die But if I don't I'll learn to float, Oh you know I will be alright But every once in a while I'll sit and stare at you Through countless stucco ceiling tiles... But what else can I do? I guess it's just a part of losing all my faith in you... So I'll believe it when I see it Don't you say it unless you mean it When I die you're coming clean Is there more than just flesh on these Bones? So I'll believe it when I see it I'll be begging, I'll be pleading When I die you're coming clean Is there more than just flesh on these Bones?
4.
You spend your days Stumbling through the haze Oh, tell me about it Talk shit about this town With no one else around You just wanna get out You’re so much more concerned with being cool Than swimming to the deep end of the pool Slave away At minimum wage Oh, tell me about it Every day’s the same "This whole town’s fucking lame" Oh, tell me about it You’re so much more concerned with being cool Than swimming to the deep end of the pool So when are you gonna grow up and get somewhere? I’m sick of watching old friends disappear I know it’s hard, I got that crystal clear You’re not so much as comfortable as scared But you’re only fooling yourself But not very well I’ve seen the way you stare But delta sunsets don’t look so good from here You’re so much more concerned with being cool Than swimming to the deep end of the pool
5.
And I will wait Until you learn from my mistakes I know you heard what I said Even in the Land of the Deaf they still heard what I said Cause nothing's gonna change All the way from the weather to your girl's last name Cause no matter what you say The world is too cold to get carried away... yeah. When everything is black and white it comes down To everything being fight or flight. It comes down. I think that I've been waiting long enough. The color's fading From the tattoo of that name they left on my arm. So I'll write Summer songs for Winter soldiers Help you up and dust off your shoulders If I can't make it then I'll make sure to do everything I can For you... Just for you Some say that we're all alone That we are nothing more than what we started from But I can't accept that
6.
Heavy is the way that it felt As it fell around me And everything seems so out of place Since these mirrors found me You put up the sun so I'd take the moon down The sunlight burns the soul of this town But life is just a hemorrhage to you It's far too much to go through... While you're waiting Infinity means nothing While you're waiting Oh, won't you wait beside me? "Everything is waiting on you..." She said to him and he followed through and they may fall apart tomorrow... but for tonight, they're so alive! They are the sun and moon And they're strown across the sky! And everything will be heaven tonight... But in the meantime My body is broken, Dependent on oxygen. My body... Depends on you. While you're waiting infinity means nothing While you're waiting... Try not to look so lonely
7.
Deep in my brain There’s an itch, there’s a feeling Not sure it’s one I believe in. It might sound strange But I’m sick of the history More concerned with the mystery Of my fate I wanna know why you not I Am the one to decide it. You sit and you wait For the world to deny you Put that ache deep inside you. So take a vacation Start in December. Don’t come back till you remember The look on your face That started as cryptic And soon became apocalyptic. You can even take a page, my dear Out of my book Learn not to give even one fuck About what they say ‘Cause I am the future And you’re still living in the past. But I won’t follow you down the road to Judecca It’s time for a change The kind that creeps inside In the middle of the night. Digs deep in your brain And spreads like a sickness A dark and unholy Christmas. If you can’t stand the strain Maybe close both your eyelids Don’t be a fool and do what I did Staying up too late To wait on the future And hope it’ll fill you with sutures. But I won’t follow you down the road to Judecca
8.
Chalk Talk 04:52
It's the middle of the night, you're wrapped up tight We go walking... Under the old streetlight we hear cats fight We're just walking... Yeah, but we both know that it's all a show We keep walking... Cause it's all we can do to make it through We keep walking... As each moment passes we all raise our glasses Even though we know that it can't change the way we feel I can't win this time cause you won't change your mind I can't win this time but you're never gonna get it! You're never gonna get it! You're stuck in your ways, you're never gonna change You keep walking... But the sidewalk's cracked. You're gonna break your back If you keep walking... And maybe our life is like these streetlights A big fake light to last till the sunrise They flicker and spark to fend off the dark Getting farther apart, we're getting farther apart As each moment passes we all raise our glasses Even though we know that it can't change the way we feel I can't win this time cause you won't change your mind I can't win this time but you're never gonna get it! You're never gonna get it! As each moment passes we all raise our glasses Even though we know that it won't change the way we feel As each moment passes we all raise our glasses
9.
Énouement 01:17
(instrumental)
10.
Hemingway 03:08
Oh God I can't escape this feeling My body burns, my stomach turns, with every line I'm stealing And I call this shovel "Apathy" as I dig the grave they'll use to bury me Oh God I can't escape this feeling... So why can't you wake up (wake up!) and take a lot around? You could take it all in before I come back down. Or was it something I said that made you sweat? Don't bother with names, you know I'll forget it. Cause no one else in this god damn world Could feel the way I feel about these Girls, and Gods, and Politics I'm so strung out, so fake and pretentious... Oh God I can't escape this feeling My body burns, my stomach turns, with every line I'm stealing And I call this shovel "Apathy" as I dig the grave they'll use to bury me Oh God I can't escape this feeling... I saw you waiting by the staircase I saw the same old face in the same old place And I realized then that I've been doing This for far too long... But I would never, I'd never want to take it back I would never, I would never want to take it back... Oh God I can't escape this feeling My body burns, my stomach turns, with every line I'm stealing And I call this shovel "Apathy" as I dig the grave they'll use to bury me Oh God I can't escape this feeling... Because no one else in this god damn world Could feel the way I feel about these Girls, and God, and Politics I'm so strung out, so fake and pretentious... Oh God, I can't escape this feeling... Oh God, I can't escape this feeling...
11.
Halloween 05:20
“Halloween” If you were still here I don't know what you would do Maybe solve all my problems stitch me up with the truth But you're a lifetime away with the ghosts and the ghouls Ever since that shitty October afternoon Then word got around And we took all of those decorations down Then we bolted the door Cause  nobody lives here anymore There's nothing poetic about it I just miss you so damn much There are still so many questions So many things left undone Before Halloween Came and took you from me Permanently If you were still here I don't know who I would be Maybe still stuck in Texas, fucking selfish and mean Sometimes I wonder if you'd be proud of me It's just so hard sometimes that I just have to believe Because I've made it this far I'm not just gonna give up and wait in the car I'm taking all the pieces And building something - I just wish you could see this... There's nothing poetic about it I just miss you so damn much There are still so many questions So many things left undone Before Halloween Came and took you from me Permanently I hope you know wherever I go You are always on my mind... Every choice that I make, every stupid mistake From here till the end of time Until the day that I die There's nothing poetic about it I just miss you so damn much There are still so many questions So many things left undone But I know you'll be Right here with me Permanently
12.
The Shakes 03:45
Baby, I'm living in a bad part of town Where every yard's filled with corpses with every step you hear the sound Of each body breaking underneath all the weight Of the shame and the loathing that come from this place I wish I could just burn it all to the ground I'd pile up the bodies - shovel pound after pound They're brittle and they're broken so I don't think they'd mind If I used all their longing as fuel for the fire But sometimes I think maybe I'm not the first Like I've been here before but the roles well reversed I feel like nothing that I do will ever compare To what came before me so why should I care? And every night I dream of all the ones that swore they would forget me but in the morning they'd be dried up in a pile under an oak tree I've dried up and fallen from thousands of trees So I know I'm no different than all of these leaves I saw my first glimpse of death today And Baby, I've got the shakes Everything I do, it's all for you Gonna leave you in a world where the oceans are blue While they spend their time waiting in the green room We live life like we're gonna die soon Is this the way it's always been? Is there no prayer or medicine that can split this mobius strip Tear apart all of this bullshit? Cause every day the rich get richer While we kill ourselves on blood and liquor Demonize your education Then charge you arms and legs for your tuition Bourgeoisie gods that hold all the power Sit up top in their ivory towers Born into this pampered position With slaves in pocket - Priests and Politicians They keep you in a stranglehold Unto your debt you are betrothed They twist the facts into their favor And profit off of your slave labor Everything I do, I do it for you Cause we all know that we’re gonna die soon
13.
The Island 05:20
We're all born on an island We each get one to call our own Where all you hear is silence And the air is freezing cold We're all born alone We're all born alone It's so cold I can see my breath Or is that all the words I never said? Well I guess I should confess Get this off my chest... I've had it with these Winter woes Blowing in with the sleet and snow Trapping me inside my home Trapping me alone I've been around a long time I've watched the seasons pass Nothing lives forever Nothing's Meant to last The world is just a tundra A vast and frozen sea We come here in the Winter And that's exactly how we leave We're all born on an island We each get one to call our own We're all born alone

about

It's about a lot of stuff but mostly about whatever I guess.

credits

released April 8, 2016

All songs written and performed by Jeremiah Matthews
Recorded by Jeremiah in Jeremiah's house.
Mixed and Mastered by Clayton Gregory
Art/Design by Jeremiah

license

all rights reserved

tags

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