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The Kids Who Hold The Hatchet Were Born to Carve The Wood But All The Fires in The Forest Made Sure They Never Could, Or, The Last Few Facets of a Misplaced Romantic

by The Ellie Badge

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1.
I woke up in pieces on the side of the street With two young innocent eyes staring straight at me And she said, "Who the Hell are you supposed to be?" Yeah, she said, "Who the Hell are you supposed to be?" Well that got me thinking - Dug deep in my soul And the fact of the matter is I'm twenty-two years old And I feel like nothing I ever do even matters In fact, I know that nothing I ever do even matters And so I sink to the bottom of it all At least here I know I've got nowhere left to fall I see the lights on the turnpike, I see the lines in the sand I can feel a glass ceiling with both my hands I spent every day of my life wanting what they have Every day of my fucking life wanting what they have And so I sink to the bottom of it all At least here I know I've got nowhere left to fall And so maybe now I can do my best to find something other than hopelessness So I sink to the bottom of it all Jeremiah Matthews 2012
2.
I've got this Hatchet It's made of redwood It cuts through plastic And God, it feels good To watch you crumble Beneath the weight of all that makeup I've got these glasses That see through bullshit Like X-ray vision Except with your sins You are a phoney And there is nothing for you here And yet I still spray this song out of my charcoal lungs I never thought that you were listening Didn't know I could clear a room that fast And yet, to tell the truth, this song was never meant for you It is a tattoo - Something I've got to learn to live with I've got this baggage Yeah, I've got problems But I've been doing My best to solve them I've got a thousand tiny fractures in my brain And yet I still pray but not for long Hoping for something to prove me wrong I'd like to build something not just hack and slash at the ground (Cause we were never meant to burn the world down) But I always get the same line stuck in my head From that one song, the one that says, "If you live by the hatchet you'll die without any friends..." I've got this sadness It's like a blanket It keeps me cozy But I don't think I'd make it On the outside I'm like a common criminal Cause I've got this habit I'm never happy There's always something Waiting for me To carve a symbol Let the world know what I've done Jeremiah Matthews 2012
3.
I was on my way to Rhode Island To get me some elixir of life But what I found on the way made me nervous A world filled with fury and strife So I parked my chariot right off the turnpike And I buried all the bodies I could find And I used up all my quarters, all my pennies, nickels, dimes Just making sure they made it home alright But nothing that you ever said was right You lied to me - You told me I had time To stop and smell the roses, maybe take a sip of wine Oh, nothing that you ever said was right Now everyday I'm bitching about something My lungs are slowly filling up with bile My anger seems to rise with the oceans And I'm rebelling like it's going out of style I'm just scared that I can't love without an enemy I'm afraid that I may never be at peace Like all the good I do is somehow relative To the hatred that I carry around with me Cause nothing that you ever said was right You lied to me - You told me I had time To stop and smell the roses, maybe take a sip of wine Oh, nothing that you ever said was right I am sick and it's tearing me apart I've got a thousand tiny exit wounds all over my heart Oh yeah, the sunlight stains the surface but the shadows still slip out I am contagious and I'm taking it too far So when I get out of bed in the morning I make a promise on my life As long as I have lungs to scream it You're never gonna take me alive Cause nothing that you ever said was right You lied to me - You told me I had time To stop and smell the roses, maybe take a sip of wine Oh, nothing that you ever said was right Jeremiah Matthews 2012
4.
Something is wrong, I can feel it. In the back of my mind, in my bones, I can hear it; The sounds of your self-propelled-parade Circling the drain... Now, you can have my help, if you need it, When you're huddled in the corner, your gums just a'bleedin', I can bury that heart with my trusty spade. I can hide away the pain... ...But there is a price. Just a clip of your wings my love, don't try to fight. Come down here with me where I'm always right. Where we are a cancer but I hold the answers inside, and I can show them to you... ...I'm gonna fix you. But if it's esteem that you desire, Then you can take a quick dip in my fire and I will burn you. I will turn you into something that I can respect! But I will molest all your feelings... Doesn't that sound appealing?! I will build you up God knows how high On a balcony of lies... ...But there is a price. Just a clip of your wings my love, don't try to fight. Come down here with me where I'm always right. Where we are a cancer but I hold the answers inside, and I can show them to you... ...I'm gonna fix you. You're asking me, "This sounds just way too good to be true... What's in it for you?" Well, I get to feel like I've made a difference, Sent to you on some kind of mission, The light to my moth nailed upon this cross Of broken hearts and teenage indecision. Maybe you can love me like she did. I want what I once had, and I'll use you to get it back! ...But there is a price. Take me under your wings and I promise I won't try to fight. Take me away, take me someplace way up high Where they will fill my cup and hold me up to the light, And I'll be everything I can be... ...You're gonna fix me. Copyright 2010 Jeremiah Matthews
5.
I don't wanna get stuck living in a small town; Let the world pass me by Lay comatose and think about what happened to my life I wish I could lose these inhibitions, maybe jump on the next plane Head out West, start fresh some place where no one knows my name Cause sometimes I get so lonesome I can't think I just cower in the corner and I shrink Sometimes I feel like nothing, like I don't mean a thing Sometimes I wish they'd hurry and bury me I eat at the same restaurants where the food all tastes like shit I work the same old job because I can't afford to quit I get crap from all my neighbors just because I don't go to church But I don't think Jesus appreciates all of those dirty looks I'm trapped inside a slice of Americana A world controlled by plutocrats and thieves It's nothing like the movies, no it's nothing like it seems You know, maybe they've already buried me Nothing ever changes; It's the same old scenery There's no up's and down's or turn-arounds and I think that's what I need Cause I've got no inspiration - My muse is dead and gone And without a change of pace I just can't sing the same old songs Oh I wish that I had someone to rip my heart out Fry it up and leave it on a plate A breakfast for the buzzards - I hope they like the way it tastes Cause I havn't got much use for it these days Jeremiah Matthews 2012
6.
In a country by the ocean Ruled The White King, good and kind People lived in peaceful villages In bright and peaceful times But across the pond there was a nation With thoughts of gold and blood They sent their strongest wizards To cast a spell on us It got cold and it got quiet The clouds blocked out the sky The fear soon turned to riots Oh, you could feel the kingdom cry The king was still and serious He he had a choice to make He always had the best intentions He only wanted to keep us safe So he summoned his best alchemists And asked them to estimate Whether the cost of such a battle Was a price that we could pay They said, "There is no price that is too great in the battle for the soul You just must make sure that victory Is worth this devil's toll..." The King cried out, "I will not bend, underneath all of this weight. I will crush all these invaders. There is far too much at stake." The King was on a mission To make sure that we could win But this war was of attrition You only get what you put in So he cut down forests for their lumber He built catapults and bows He mined mountains for their minerals We had iron, steel, and gold He killed the Bison for their hides To keep us warm on Winter nights You can't win a war with wishing It's tooth for tooth and eye for eye But soon he went too far The kingdom crumbling and cold The price of power was much greater Than we could ever have foretold We may have won these savage battles But we lost a civil war Within ourselves, we lost our principles Before we drew our swords And on the rubble sat the White King Where the sun no longer shines He always had the best intentions But they warped his fragile mind As for me, you know I don't blame him I'm sure the pressure was too great Oh God, to be a king in wartime... Please save me from such a fate Jeremiah Matthews 2012
7.
When I was a kid I didn't know about my social class I just stared out the window and watched the telephone poles fly past I didn't think about things like good and evil There was never such a thing as a grey area With my dad at the wheel and my mother by his side I never had to worry about the world outside I could stay innocent forever in the backseat I never ever wanted to leave the backseat I never ever wanted to learn about all these terrible things I was naked and honest. I was so young and happy I would cover my ears and scream because I had to stay Ignorant forever in the backseat But then it was you and me, a snake, and a rosebush We were so close to the desert all we needed was a little push I'd grown to love these nylon seatbelts, they made me feel so safe But then you tapped on my window and asked me to come and play A whisper in one ear, a sin in the other And all of a sudden all we had was each other No more running away to the backseat I never ever wanted to leave the backseat The windows kept me safe from thousands of would-be cannibal kings I always thought that I'd stay stupid and naked It was all in my head, the world was what I made it Innocent forever in the backseat But one day they came for me, they tore me out of my safety belts Left me all alone on the sidewalk. It was so cold there by myself But over time I thought about it and came to see that I was wrong When the sun came up I felt it around me It was time to move along... Well maybe there's more to life than the backseat I mean, in the grand scheme when have I ever known what the best thing was for me? I guess it's time to lose these shackles Let the sunlight burn my eyes Because I'll never learn to drive in the backseat Jeremiah Matthews 2012

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released October 6, 2012

All songs written, produced, and performed by The Ellie Badge. Copyright 2012

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